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Wolves of Wall Street
December. 31,2002 RJeff Allen just got a new job in one of Manhattan's wealthiest brokerage firms, Wolfe Brothers. Here young, good-looking stockbrokers make a lot of money by being particularly cutthroat. Jeff finds out that the real secret to their success is an animal instinct that is turning him into a werewolf, but it may be too late for him to get out.
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Reviews
Truly Dreadful Film
This movie was so-so. It had it's moments, but wasn't the greatest.
It's an amazing and heartbreaking story.
Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable
It sounded like it could be fun. The premise of the most powerful brokerage firm on Wall Street being run by hunky werewolves could have worked. And the film does boast some capable actors, even an amusing cameo appearance by Louise Lasser (from "Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman"). Obviously, one doesn't expect a classic film, but the least these people could have delivered is something enjoyably bad. But there is no excuse for it being so dull. There are no werewolf transformations on camera, for starters. Eric Roberts plays the senior partner of the firm with "where's my paycheck?" restlessness, while the supporting cast just goes through the motions. There are constant, repetitive shots of Wall Street buildings, full moons (do full moons happen several nights in a row there?), embarrassingly bad wolf puns, and an idiotic flashback from a party. In the flashback in question, the brokers all strip off their clothes Chippendale's style, then crawl to a pair of seated female models, sniffing and licking their hands and legs while the women moan (but look like they're yawning). Meanwhile, the sound of wolves growling plays on the soundtrack. What do they plan to do to the women? Seduce them? Eat them? Hump their legs and pee on the carpeting? I never figured it out. There are a few off-camera killings, but it's the paying audience who are the real victims. David DeCoteau (the man responsible for this) belongs in the doghouse.
This movie seemed like a fun way of wasting time. I figured that the movie would be a cheesy werewolf movie only useful to kill time, boy was I wrong. This movie was a total waste of money, I don't even know why I rented it anymore. This film sucked so bad, because the story was a piece of crap, its intents of suspense, drama and horror fell flat on their asses. THERE ARE NO WEREWOLVES IN THIS MOVIE!!!!!! no whatsoever, I can't even complain about the bad special effects, because there are none!! It doesn't even have blood or anything like that. No tits, No blood, No werewolves. NO NOTHING. This film was nothing but a waste of time. Do yourself a favor and skip this piece of trash.
If you're going to make a movie about werewolves or vampires someone should actually turn into one. It would have been a good low-budget movie with a different hook but they failed to make a monster. Maybe it was a budget thing, I've been there. ADVISE: If you don't have enough money to do it right, don't do it!
Anyone who's portfolio has plummeted this past few years should enjoy this movie if they're into metaphors. It's all about stockbrokers acting as predators, rampaging in a pack to ensnare unsuspecting investors.I'm all in favor of a "Ripped-from-the Headlines" opus but it's too bad the filmmakers don't have a better vehicle than this rickety contraption with its low production values and stilted dialogue.Into the brokerage house of Woolf Brothers comes Jeff Allen, just out of business school with a dufflebag full of suits and no experience. Surprisingly, he qualifies to gain access to the Woolf's lair and adopts the firm's highly touted instinct to "focus, seek and attack." Sooner than it takes to say:"Look, there's another full moon" Jeff has acquired a taste for lots of purchasing orders and raw red meat.I think there was an opportunity here to develop a stronger storyline -- even a fun comedy -- but director David DeCoteau seems not to have risen above the mundane. Seen at the 2003 American Film Market in Santa Monica.
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