Simply Perfect

One of my all time favorites.

Blistering performances.

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

"Growing Yourself" is a segment that features a guy leaving his wife to raise his kids on his own. What fascinates me about this is that the movie is just so boring. I think this may in fact be the most boring comedy I've ever seen. That probably does make it one of the worst. I can't even tell if there were supposed to be jokes in this. I was almost asking for a laughtrack. "Success Wanters" features a woman who starts off as a stripper and then becomes rich by marrying into the margarine industry. She eventually marries the President. What is this supposed to be satirizing? Apparently, this is a parody of soap operas. I have no clue what this even has to do with anything as the plot is so random. The jokes are all forced and garner no laughs."Municipalities" has Christopher Lloyd, easily the most recognizable actor here. This segment is seemingly a parody of cop movies as it features a guy tracking down a serial killer. I guess I haven't seen that many cop movies. This was still pointless, with unlikeable characters and the same unfunny jokes over and over. I guess this was the first truly awful spoof movie. National Lampoon had fallen even back in 1982. *

Richard Widmark, Diane Lane, Peter Riegert, Robert Culp, Olympia Dukakis, Christopher Lloyd, Henny Youngman, Rhea Perlman, ... all SHOULD NOT HAVE appeared in this movie! Watching an anthology film of these accomplished entertainers reading from the Hollywood telephone directory would be a vastly more enjoyable way for the viewer to spend 89 minutes, than attempting to sit through this awful waste of time and talent.We have all experienced movies which compel us to just finish watching the film we have started, because surely there must be a payoff. We think "I'll just hang in there because, hey, it can't get any worse, right?" Well, this film will elicit such a feeling by about 30-minutes in; if not well before that. The viewer should be forewarned: Oh, it DOES get worse. It gets MUCH worse! In fact, of the three film shorts comprising this anthology movie, the final segment is almost unwatchable. Which seems a cynical and intentionally sadistic decision by the film's directors and editor to deal-out lingering punishment to those viewers who stick with it to the bitter end!If one needed to build an argument for irrevocably destroying all record of a work of "art", this film would be exhibit number 1 of that argument. All copies of this movie, both electronic and physical media should be destroyed. And all of those associated with its creation should be provided humanitarian hypnotherapy, so that they too can erase all memory of their involvement in its creation, and end the terrible recurrent nightmares which undoubtedly haunt their lives.In addition to leaving an indelible black mark of shame on the résumés of these, and a couple of dozen other actors/comedians who made the terrible career mistakes of appearing in it, this 1982 fiasco also ignominiously taints the National Lampoon franchise which produced such classics as 'Animal House' and 'Christmas Vacation'.*** SPOILER ALERT *** Two things will be universal for those who make the serious error in judgment of sitting down to watch 'National Lampoon's Movie Madness': 1) You will be left with nagging regret for what you could otherwise have done with the hour and a half of your life that you wasted; and 2) By the time the third anthology segment begins -- a police story built around a running gag about a Rookie Cop who is shot, daily -- you will want someone to shoot YOU, or shoot yourself just to make it stop. Please, God, make it stop!!!A couple of parting thoughts: Richard Widmark lived another 10-years after the release of this film: Testaments to both his personal humility (for not spending those remaining years of his life as a recluse); and to his belief in the power of forgiveness (he didn't have his agent whacked!)IMDb, you really do need to give reviewers the option of rating a movie "0 of 10". Being required to give this movie a "1" rating, in order to post a review, has made me feel like I need to shower.

Hey, this was a parody, and I thought it was pretty funny in parts. It was arranged in order from weakest to best episodes.I didn't care for the first episode at all. It just seemed pointless, and the parody elements were over the top. I guess I missed the redeeming feature of Teresa Ganzel's T&A scene because I saw the movie on TV, where they censor anything good.The second episode about the corporate climbing rags-to-riches story was better, but I really didn't get into it until just about the end, where the First Lady relinquishes her marriage and position to Dominique. that's when it struck me that this whole story was just a parody of a feminist's wet dream. Then I thought the story was pretty funny, but fairly predictable and linear.The third episode I thought was great! I loved the parody of every serious cop coming-of-age flick ever done, and I liked Robby Benson's acting. Yes, I said that. I thought his smarmy, sensitive young cop fresh out of the academy was just sickening enough to avoid being over the top, and then I absolutely loved the way he suddenly became a rude, burned-out, unkempt, obnoxious cop. It was a great juxtaposition and I gained respect for Benson right there.The plot of the third episode was tight, and it even had a twist at the end after the burned-out Falcone kicks Nagursky out of the car to attend to a dangerous domestic dispute, and then Falcone ends up getting shot (again), even though he stayed in the car this time!Actually, I saw the end of this movie several years ago and I remembered the little closing shot of Benson doing some Buster-Keaton-like prat-falls down the road as the iris fade closes in. I was impressed by his physical acting (if that was indeed Benson and not a stunt double).

I chuckled a few times during this movie. I laughed out loud during the notarizing of the margarine company handover (pun intended).There are three segments in this movie. The first one is supposed to be a spoof of "woman 'grows up' and launches career" movies. The Tampax® box was the funniest thing in this segment. Most of the cast members aren't listed here on IMDb. They are the lucky ones. Few other people will be able to connect this thing to the ruin of their acting careers.The second segment is a spoof of "sharkish woman sleeps her way to the top and seizes control of huge industry" movies. Robert Culp has several funny moments, all physical humor, including the aforementioned handover. After his character dies the segment sinks lower and lower as Dominique Corsaire rises higher and higher. By the time she becomes First Lady I wanted to rip the cable out of the TV and watch "snow." I switched to Pakistani music videos instead. I don't understand Urdu, or whatever language the videos were in. It was still better than listening to the dialogue in this painfully dull "story."Then came "Municipalians" with the *big* stars, half of them on screen for less than a minute: Elisha Cook, Jr., Christopher Lloyd, Rhea Perlman, Henny Youngman, Julie Kavner, Richard Widmark and ... *Robby Benson.* It's supposed to be a spoof of "young cop teams with hardened, substance abusing older cop who needs retirement *badly*" movies. The horizontal flash bar on the police car is very impressive. It was interesting seeing old RTD buses, and a Shell gas station sign, and an American Savings sign -- none of them are around anymore. Nagurski's "Never stop anywhere you might have to get out the car" made me smile momentarily. Then they discuss how boring the young cop is. A lot. Back and forth about how boring he is. That was as boring as this description of how boring it is. Nagurski's Law Number Four, "Never go into a music store that's been cut into with an acetylene torch," made me think that the music store is a real business at the actual location the dispatcher gave. Thinking about that was more interesting than the set-up for the gag which followed. Young Falcone (Benson) gets shot. A lot. He becomes a hardened cop like Nagurski. The segment keeps going. On and on. And on. It won't stop. It rolls relentlessly onward no matter how many times you wish he'd just *die* already so this thing will end. It doesn't. It goes on and on and on.... Then a "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" episode which I've seen four times already comes on. Thank God! This abysmal movie ended while I went to get the mail.