Undescribable Perfection

Don't listen to the negative reviews

Instead, you get a movie that's enjoyable enough, but leaves you feeling like it could have been much, much more.

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

Alright, I admit it's not a great comedy. Still, it's oddly enjoyable. Part of this is due to the likable cast. They seem to be having a good time. I'm a fan of classic monster movies so that's an added bit of fun for me. I also really liked the Yugoslavian locations where it was shot. I don't know how else to explain it but to say it's a fun movie. Not funny, but fun. Hope that makes sense. The most memorable part of the movie is Geena Davis' incredibly sexy vampire. I think children of the '80s will appreciate it for its nostalgic value. So...yeah, it' s not going to make you snort milk out of your nose but it's a good time. If nothing else, see it for Geena's cleavage.

Transylvania 6-5000Flights to Transylvania are typically the only ones that airlines will allow passengers to carry wooden stakes and guns loaded with silver-bullets on.Unfortunately, the tabloid reporters on assignment in this horror-comedy only packed their flash bulb camera.After their ornery editor (Norman Fell) comes in contact with video documentation of Frankenstein, he sends his goof-off son Gil (Ed Begley Jr.) and a hardnosed newsman Jack (Jeff Goldblum) to the Romanian countryside.Once in Transylvania, Jack and Gil encounter a gypsy who encourages their investigation.Digging deeper, they come across an unhinged physician (Joseph Bologna) determined to socialize the creatures he created in his experiments, including a werewolf, a sea-monster and a vivacious vampire (Geena Davis).A saucy send-up of classic horror archetypes, this screwball comedy is highlighted by some great comedic performances and adult oriented humour.Incidentally, tabloids today would only be interested in monsters caught without their makeup.(Yellow Light)vidiotreviews.blogspot.ca

Hey, they've taken the title of an old Glenn Miller hit and replaced Pennsylvania with Transylvania—isn't that hilarious? Well, actually, no, it isn't—and neither is anything else about this film!A dreadful comedy/horror with a surprisingly decent cast, this has got to be one of the least amusing movie experiences I've ever had. Written and directed by regular Mel Brooks collaborator Rudy De Luca, the film is a desperate attempt to replicate Brooks' 'madcap' style, but which falls flat on its face thanks to the dreadfully weak material and ill-advised improvisational performances that result in some truly ludicrous moments that defy description. Bizarre it most certainly is, but on what plane of existence it could ever be considered funny I really haven't a clue.Michael Richards baffles as demented butler Fejos; Carol Kane and John Byner irritate as kooky kitchen staff Lupi and Radu; a manic Joseph Bologna maddens as doctor Malavaqua; and Goldblum and Begley Jr. do their utmost to emulate Abbot and Costello's buddy-buddy style banter, but fail in every respect, the pair lacking any chemistry whatsoever. The only person whose performance I enjoyed was Geena Davis, on account of her revealing vampire costume—but even Geena in sexy goth get-up isn't worth sitting through this garbage for.

Two tabloid reporters Jack Harrison and Gil Turner travel to Transylvania to cover a story on the monster Frankenstein that was supposedly caught on video footage. The locals discover their reason for being there and laugh of it, but the mayor and local chief of police are hiding something from Jack and Gil. Through their journey to uncover this mystery they encounter many odd characters and weird situations.Don't childhood memories just seem to make things a lot greater than they actually were? Oh, yes that can happen. And it occurred with this feature. Although I had a fine time with the film, but I remember it being funnier than it was. "Transylvania 6-5000" is a gleefully silly hit and miss lukewarm affair aimed at spoofing the classic mad doctor and monster themes of the early golden years. It has one foot planted in the juvenile pool, while the other is kicking about in clever screwball antics. With so much potential ammo to poke fun at, it falls extremely short, as there seems to be a shortage of gags that stay afloat in the aimlessly overlong, but randomly on-the-spot screenplay. Sight jokes have little input (though Richards thought otherwise) with the main focus more so on the repetitively lagging dialogues and flat stretches. Everything feels like its simply going with the flow. It basically takes half of the movie before the monster investigation takes shape and the ghouls make their appearances. What mostly comes across is embarrassing, rather than humorous. Mel Brooks definitely did a better job of it with "Young Frankenstein (1974)" and oddly enough writer/director Rudy DeLuca co-wrote the screenplays for Brooks': "Silent Movie (1976) and "High Anxiety (1977)". Not to take anything away from DeLuca as he crafts some flashy images amongst loony and jocular moments (like the film's opening involving the reporters getting the story) that do work. Although that's marginally because of the fruitfully campy performances.The down-to-earth Jeff Goldblum is his usual sophisticated; dry sarcastic self as Jack and the edgy Ed Begley Jr. is good as Jacks' ill-fated partner Gil. The snappily colourful banter and crackling chemistry (that reminds you of "Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein") between them worked a treat. The ensemble-supporting cast they got for the feature is rather interesting too. Michael (impulsively creative comic) Richards is absurdly flamboyant as the castle's porter Fejos. Who likes to spontaneously bob up from nowhere and hassle Begley Jr's character with plenty of psychical jokes that turn into amusing results. The weird doll scene that opens Richard's character was a ball and his was a standout in what you could call a prototype for the Kramer character of "Seinfeld". Even his accent reminded me off Borat. A delightfully spunky Geena Davis is desirably teasing as Countess Dracula with a flavorous Bela Lugosi accent. The talented Jeffery Jones is truly fantastic as the suspicious looking two-faced Mayor Lepescu and Joseph Bologna is superb as the erratically minded mad (although he can be nice) scientist. While, Carol Kane can be extremely irritating in her nagging role of Lupi. There's something lovable about her oddball character and her pairing up with John Byner's downtrodden servant Radu that makes it worthwhile. Elizabeth Ellison is there to look pretty and be the token love interest of the story. Another up and down element was the wailing soundtrack has that really tacky, but quite catchy shtick to it. The quickly made project looks like it had a miniature budget and they work around it neatly enough. The workable make-up for the monsters are impressively done (though the werewolf is pretty plain) for this type of feature. The title happens to be a pun of a Glen Miller big band tune and also happened to be a title of a Warner Brothers' Bugs Bunny cartoon.I find it hard not be charmed by this ridiculously mad-hat comedy with its pleasantly well-shot Yugoslavia locations and unusual characters. It can be quite forced on the humour front and rely to heavily on its actors' presences, but I'm still slightly enlightened by it even though it didn't impress me like it did when first encountered it.Side-note: The interestingly informative and highly witty DVD commentary track involving Director/writer Rudy DeLuca and visual consultant Steve Haberman is a real hoot.