You won't be disappointed!

I like movies that are aware of what they are selling... without [any] greater aspirations than to make people laugh and that's it.

Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.

The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

The duo of Patsy Kensit and Elizabeth Hurley may look like a jackpot of sexiness on paper, but "Kill Cruise" is actually pretty tame and rarely goes beyond the bikini level. The film begins rather awkwardly, but it improves as soon as the three main characters set sail; the uncertainty about who is good and who is bad, as well as about whether some past events are connected to the present, keeps you watching. But after a certain point, it begins to drag; making a 90+ minute film with only three characters and one setting (the boat in the open sea) is no easy task. And then comes the ending, which I must admit is quite unpredictable, and features a chillingly calm, detached performance by a certain cast member (I won't say which one, to avoid spoilers), but doesn't provide the film with much of a point. The sailing sequences are well-shot, though the DVD transfer is rather poor. ** out of 4.

I expected this to be a "good bad" movie - the kind that's so bad it's entertaining. However, in terms of performance and script I was surprised to find that it was much better than expected. Jurgen Prochnow is always good, no matter how bad the material he is given. But even Patsy Kensit and Elizabeth Hurley did well portraying two self-absorbed, air-headed, and talent-free bimbos who hitch a boat ride with him, expecting a relaxing pleasure cruise. I've been on a one-week cruise with two other people on a similar vessel, sailing off the coast of Maine, and can tell you that the movie accurately portrays the claustrophobic conditions on board which can lead to personality clashes. If some of the personalities are psychotic, as in this movie, the tension would become unbearable to the point of explosion. And anyone who thinks that personalities like those portrayed in the movie don't actually exist has led a very sheltered life.The sailing scenes are realistic - the motion of the boat, the feeling of vulnerability in the open ocean, how danger or an emergency can appear suddenly, the necessity for even the inexperienced to pitch in and help. Jurgen, who I have heard is a sailor in real life, moves naturally through all the duties of a captain.The twist ending came out of the blue and did not work for me. However, till then the movie was involving and I enjoyed it.

(There are Spoilers) Surviving a violent Mediterranean Sea storm the skipper, Jurgen Prochnow, was unable to save the life of his friend and fellow seaman Paul Pelikan, Mario Stock, and his former, and now Mario's, lover Mona, Gvalyna Szapolowska. The Skipper hold's himself responsible for their deaths even though he was cleared of any wrong doing by a Seaman/Mariner Court.Losing his nerve and getting drunk the Skipper hangs out all day and night, for six months, at the local Califorina Club drinking instead of going back out to sea on his ship the Bella Donna. Things change for the Skipper when he's approached by a young British duet of singer and dancer Su & Lou, Patsy Kensit & Elizabeth Hurley. The two are dying to get out of this boring ghost town of Gibraltar and sail to sunny and swinging Barbados in the West Indies. A trip of some 2,500 miles that would take over a month. The Skipper needing a reason to go back to sea on his ship jumps at the idea that the girls proposed to him and the next day the Skipper together with Su & Lou and their pet pooch Willard sails past the "Pillars of Hercules" into the wide open and dangerous Atlantic Ocean. It turned out to be a voyage straight into hell.Great scenic and ocean photography with a number of spectacular sunrise and sunsets can't overcome the film "Kill Cruise" unconvincing script and totally unbelievable surprise ending. The ending is so off-the-wall that it makes you wonder if you fell asleep while watching the film and missed something that would make it at least plausible to the movie's story.A less then glamorous Elizabeth Hurley and down in the dumps-looking Patsy Kensit make up the trio, or quintet if you include the cute little dog Willard, on the cruise yacht Bella Donna. Thing start to get edgy when Su becomes jealous of the Skipper taking her friend, and possibly lesbian lover,Lou away from her as they both have a sexual tryst right in front of her. Su plans to murder the Skipper, as well as Lou, by first letting them drown at sea as they were both swimming, and making out underwater, by taking off with the boat Bella Donna. Later Su hides the insulin that the Skipper needs for his diabetic condition and his life is saved by Lou who finds it just in time, hidden by Su inside a world globe, just before in went into insulin shock. With the crazed jealous and murderously inclined Su on deck the movie then immediately changes course where we see the three on board with Su & Lou dancing and singing as if everything that we saw up until then was forgotten about. Then were hit with an ending that's straight out of nowhere.

the title is misleading for the first 97 minutes, and then you walk away wondering what in the world just happened. did they have some film left and need a fetching title? otherwise, it's an engaging and surprisingly well done character study. similar to dead calm, another cabin fever murder at sea also with a somewhat inexplicable villain. a very funny bit was the fact that the apparently drug addled and soused skipper ends up looking even more pathetic when it turns out he isn't drug addled, just a diabetic. a possible explanation of the blindside ending: there is one scene where liz hurley is sitting in the middle of the boat, as her maddening, fueding shipmates are in opposite cabins. she's tired of it. it's cabin fever, and perhaps we see on her face a glimmer of the acknowledgment that those two are not worth the aggravation. a callous disregard for human life, but familiar, i'd guess, to anyone who has endured a long, hot roadtrip with other people. who are squabbling. the entire way from wisonsin to walmart, south dakota. about mount rushmore and indian sacred ground. where is that darn spear gun!